One Love

Words thrum through the air
And stick in my heart

As I absorb them
One by one

Like a pin cushion
Till the pain seeps

Through the cracks
Spilling down my cheeks

Splashing across the backs
of my hands

Pooling at my feet
As I pray

Oh, God,
I am not enough…

Fibers rend
Flesh from flesh

As I begin to see that
I simply cannot love

For two

Cannot will my son to

To breathe,
To hope

I can only

And trust
Relinquish my son

To the One
Who never fails

No matter how this ends
Because somehow

In this upside down
Inside out

Live to die
Die to live

There is Love

Pulsing within my own soul

Bursting, splitting,
Rending my very self

But it costs
Cutting deeper

Than I ever dreamed

As I slowly tear open
Tear-soaked fingers

Surrendering heart and soul
And self

~ me ~
As a living sacrifice

Not once
But again and again

And again

Relinquishing every want
Hope, dream

For Him

To receive
The whole measure

Of the fullness of Christ

God with us!

Poured out

Spilled over

He is Love


Linking with the beautiful community at Graceful:

For the past four weeks we’ve been studying 1 Corinthians 13 in church. For the past ten weeks, we’ve been experiencing one of the toughest parenting cliffs of our lives. Together they’ve spilled out into this, One Love, because God is good. All the time. And though today I know only in part, one day I “shall know fully, even as I am known.” Joy in the midst of hard! Love that conquers all!

Sharing also with Laura at the Wellspring:

And with DversePoets, where words spill and poets speak.


17 thoughts on “One Love

  1. I don’t know what you’re facing with your son, but God does and I will lift him and you up to the Father. Beautiful post and I hope that you and your family are blessed.


  2. What would we do without these creative outlets?
    The way you choose your words, then arrange them and organize them and bring them to life to unlock our empathic hearts in ways we want to feel – and don’t, but can’t help it when we read you and feel you and get you because you share your heart and prayers. Our hearts echo those heartfelt prayers. Hear those echoes and know you are not alone.
    In His Love that Never Fails.
    Love you,


  3. Thanks for sharing your heart so transparently. I’ve always run for the pen when my heart is wounded and cut right open. His love never fails. And His love knows your pain as He watched His own son bleed and die for the world. May His love be your comfort and may you sense His presence in a powerful way.


  4. pastordt

    You continue in my thoughts and prayers, Cindee, as you walk this hard, hard road. You’ve described it exquisitely – all the pain and heartbreak and helplessness — and the undergirding presence of a loving God right in the middle of all that brokenness. Praying that answers/help/openness/relief will come. Soon.


  5. ihatepoetry

    This was a powerful, raw write. For me, the power comes from all the phrases short and in quick succession; produces an effect that this is a confession. Loved reading this, and if it is biographical, I pray for your comfort, Best, Moskowitz


  6. ladynyo

    What ever your travail with your son, you got me straight in the heart with this. May your own heart, and his, be soothed.

    Lady Nyo


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